I always had a vision of fame and my life’s purpose was music. I loved performing; if a stage was available, I wanted to be on it. I spent my high school years honing my craft in drama, chorus, and music class. I was good and the applause felt great. I knew that I wanted more of it.
After graduating, I left home to start a band. I played bass and had a few talented friends that convinced me that we could make it on the big stage. I was sure we’d be discovered in no time and I’d achieve my dreams.
Once on my own, I quickly realized that the high school stage, with an audience full of parents and families, was very different from the adult world of gigs and rock and roll. Finances were tight, and I struggled to make money, jumping from part time job to part time job, working 12 hour shifts to pay the bills. After a full day’s work, I’d spend nights gigging with the band.
As I burned out, I turned to drugs to cope with my failures. Though I was high most of the time, I was really at my lowest low.
After several wasted years, I wandered into Grace Church in Boston, Massachusetts. During worship, I broke down, singing with my head hanging in surrender and my arms up in praise. Somehow, my voice rang out, over the rest of the congregation and the volume of the speakers. The worship leader came right up to me after service and invited me to join the worship band.
I realized then that when I was chasing fame, God was chasing me.
Today, I no longer live for my own glory, but live to give God all the glory. I wake up on Sundays, grab my guitar, and serve as the Worship Director at a local church outside of Washington DC. I get to sing praises to a God who loved, saved, and provided for me. I don’t crave for the audience’s applause anymore; instead, I have the honor of leading people to the feet of Jesus.
And that stage that always beckoned for me? That stage is now the Lord’s altar, fulfilling me with God’s vision of worship and purposing my life to serve Him.
Kristen KaufmanMarch 8, 2023 at 10:48 am
What an incredible piece! Such an encouragement and reminder that while we aren’t always faithful, our Kind and Loving Father is ALWAYS faithful, and never-changing. Praise God.