When our son, Isaac, was 17 months old, we were told words that no parent ever wants to hear: “your son has cancer”. I remember feeling numb. And I wanted to run screaming from that room and tell them they were wrong. Instead, I sat there rocking my baby and silently asking God ‘why?’.
I remember looking out the windows of the hospital those first days very angry, thinking “how can the sun still shine when we are in such darkness?” Then I realized that the sun is always shining. Even when we can’t see it on cloudy days, it is there; maybe not visible, but present just the same.
It was a turning point for my attitude. You see, I realized that just as the sun rises each day, no matter what we might be going through, the Son has risen FOR us. It was no easy journey and people would ask “how do you do it?” And while the simple answer was that we had no choice, we decided to begin to use it as an opportunity to share our faith. One night, a dear friend called and told me she just couldn’t understand why God would do this to us. I told her that if I started asking myself “why us”, it would imply that I wanted it to be someone else. Yet, why is a pretty common question we have in times of need. So as I spoke on the phone that night, I told her that maybe she was right, maybe I should be asking God “why?”.
We started asking God why He chose us. How were we meant to change the world with this? How could we bring more people to Christ from this?
We started speaking at events about our faith in the midst of the unthinkable. We wrote of our pain, allowing the world to see our raw emotions while reminding them that God is great! And while there were many difficult days, we always knew there was a greater plan we were meant to fulfill. Isaac is now 8 years old; full of love, laughter and spunk. But most of all, full of God’s light that he continues to spread through his love of life. So when you want to ask God why, try to remember that YOU are his why!
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