I got pregnant when I was 19 years old and single.
When I first found out, I was in shock and wondered what I would do. My family was very supportive of me raising my daughter or placing her for adoption, whatever I desired. I prayed constantly for a sign. And I got it a few weeks into the pregnancy.
My boyfriend broke up with me but he still wanted to be in our daughter’s life. I was not comfortable with him and his tumultuous family situation being part of our child’s world. So I took this break-up as a clear sign from the Lord. I truly feel the Lord needed that relationship to end and when it did, my decision was clear. I decided that placing my daughter for adoption into a loving Christian home would be what’s best for her.
In Mississippi, a woman cannot place her child for adoption without the consent of the birth father. So I was advised to move to Alabama, so he would have to jump through some hoops to receive visitation rights. I figured if this was really important to him, he would make that effort. But he didn’t, and I was cleared to place my daughter for adoption.
I moved into a Lifeline home for unwed mothers. In many ways, this was difficult since I was away from the comfort of my family, and surrounded by a number of other hormonal teenage girls. But in looking back, I can see the Lord stripped away my worldly support and He made me rely on Him. I was raised in a loving, two-parent, Christian home but my faith wasn’t that strong. But I moved so close to Him during this time. The Lord uses your trials to bring you closer to Him.
The Lord also used this pregnancy to bring me closer to my parents. I had been a bit of a rebellious child when it came to boys, and this pregnancy showed me their unconditional love, something that Jesus modeled for all of us.
Every day in that home, I would walk several miles. I used that time to clear my mind and talk to God. I prayed for clarity and for Him to bless my decision to place my daughter for adoption. I constantly prayed for my child’s health and for the Christian family that would raise her. Little did I know that the woman I would eventually choose to be her adoptive mother was running every day, praying for the birth mother of a baby she might one day adopt.
When it came time to choose my child’s family, God made it so clear to me. My daughter is in a wonderful Christian home and I feel such incredible peace with my decision. When you’re going through a difficult time, it’s sometimes hard to see how the Lord is working in your situation. But it is so clear now when I look back to see His hands in this.
I am now happily married with a loving and Godly husband, and three of the most beautiful kids ever. And through my experience, I have really become an adoption advocate.
I want to be a resource to any woman that has an unplanned pregnancy since I am someone who has been down that road. I have been very open with my friends and church about the path I have walked. I have spoken at churches and to groups of unwed mothers. I really enjoy speaking one on one with a pregnant unmarried woman and walking with them through their pregnancy. I’ve had the privilege to do that several times. I know the fears, the questions and the thoughts they are experiencing.
I pray every day that the Lord uses me and my story in any way that can glorify Him. I am His story of how He used me, and I want to be faithful in any way I can. I hope I’m an example of how the Lord can use every situation in a very positive way and for His glory.